George RR Martin Delights Fans by Finishing Entire Sentence

 
Patient fans of George R.R. Martin’s A Song of Ice and Fire series were thrilled by a recent press release stating that the author has finally completed an entire sentence. With this creative breakthrough in the writing of his long-awaited sixth installment, The Winds of Winter, Martin has his more optimistic readers buzzing with excitement.

        

“As the wait goes on, some of us have had to adapt and manage our expectations,” fan Jillian McCormick explained. “So, one sentence may only seem like a tiny piece of an enormous puzzle, but at least he didn’t delete an entire sentence, right? Sounds like progress to me!”

“It’s never wise to rush the work of a genius,” blogger Caleb Blake posted. “G.R.R.M. constructing a sentence in its entirety is glorious news, and at the rate he’s at, there’s a solid chance we could be seeing The Winds of Winter in print mere days before the author turns 80 in September of 2029. So, I mean, in geological terms, an eleven-year wait is nothing.”

          

Shortly after announcing that he had at long last finished a whole sentence, the acclaimed novelist went on to say he was “more joyous than Tyrion Lannister at a pleasure house in the free city of Lys” and proud of his latest achievement.

           

“This is cause for merriment!” Martin declared. “Mayhaps I should treat myself to indulgences of meat, mead, and Magic: The Gathering!”

         

Despite his elation, the Locus Award-winning scribe did own up to his bouts with writer’s block, which he attributed to the pressure of composing not just one but two mammoth 1,500-page manuscripts to finalize his magnum opus of seven intricately woven fantasy novels. He also noted factors such as “the mirth one gets from a marathon of Impractical Jokers” and having “other shit to do.”

The more easygoing members of Martin’s fanbase have understood. That includes A Wiki of Ice and Fire contributor Claire Cumberland.

          

“King’s Landing wasn’t built in one day,” she said with a shrug.  

        

As a bonus, Martin went the extra mile by revealing the contents of the sentence he just added to The Winds of Winter. (Warning: Spoiler ahead!) The landmark passage appears to be a line of dialogue most likely spoken in the far north, at or around the mystical Cave of the Three-Eyed Raven: 

“Hodor,” Hodor said.

         

Seven Hells... What a sentence! We are so excited for what could unfold somewhere between 2019 and 2036. (Fingers crossed.)

          
The creators of HBO’s Game of Thrones could not be reached for comment since they happened to be aboard a long flight at press time, and it seems modern-day airplanes move a lot slower than the fucking dragon Daenarys Targaryen rode in the season seven episode “Beyond the Wall.”